September 1, 2005
-
Yesterday was a bad day. Absolutely nothing got done on my list of things to get done, because Josh wouldn't get his lazy ass out of bed. He claims he doesn't remember that morning which isn't so hard to believe since he moves (like sits up) and talks in his sleep. But by the time he got up and took a shower I was so upset that it didn't do much good. After fighting for a while I smoked 3 bowls of hash weed... wow I couldn't even stand straight but it helped big time. I was able to calm down and talk to him clearly about what was upsetting me and it helped me to get some dreamless sleep. I think that is what I like most about smoke! The dreamless sleeps. I just dont sleep well when I have nightmares, even if I sleep through them without waking. Normally once I have one nightmare, the rest of the night is all nightmares! And the nightmares aren't of demons and stuff, it is about realistic situations that could happen that bring up my greatest fears and forces me to realize them. I have been told that is part of depression, it definitely hurts my mood. I don't understand it though, you would think if you where living out whatever upsets you in your sleep, that you would be refreshed when you woke up. That by facing them in dreams it wouldn't keep them bottled up inside you. That's not true for me though.
Recent Comments